Sex furniture usually makes people think of dungeons and clubs (which are still a lot of fun don’t get me wrong.) However, you need to think of the simplicity of sex furniture first. You might not be into BDSM and all the trappings of the club scene. However, you might want some sex furniture that makes getting it on that much more fun. (Yes, I can say getting it on.)
As you read through this list, you can start small move up to something even more exciting, and deck out your home in sex furniture. (In a lot of cases, people will never know what they are looking at.)
What are you Looking For in Sex Furniture?
Sex furniture should be durable, easy to use, easy to set up, and easy to hide. You need to consider a few things when you make your purchase:
• Can I break down this furniture and hide it?
• Can I hide this furniture in plain sight?
• Do I need to hide this furniture in another room?
• Can this furniture be incorporated into your existing design?
You cannot just buy sex furniture without knowing where to put it because the pieces get bigger and bigger until you feel like you are in a sex club and you have no way to hide all your toys.
How is Sex Furniture Installed?
In short, only when you need to. If you are not comfortable with permanent sex furniture in your home, you need to find something modular that is easy to move. If you are installing sex furniture, you need to come up with a design idea that hides the true intent of the furniture. Kinky couples and singles do this all the time, but they put a lot of effort into before buying large furniture pieces.
Are you Nimble Enough for this Furniture?
There’s a great line from a TV show I like where an older guy tells his grandson he ought to do big things now before he’s, “too old to do anything really fun.” You kind of have to be realistic with yourself. If you are getting older, pick sex furniture that will be easier for you to use. If you are younger, you will be more nimble—and that means you can use wild sex furniture.
(I recently gave this advice to my best friend. She’s a hot 25-year old single woman. She needs to find a guy who can do EVERYTHING to her before she’s not quite as nimble as she once was.)
Older ladies, before you get upset—you’re hot. You’re hot as hell. I saw the most devastatingly beautiful woman in line the other day with this silvery grey hair. Tall, slender, gorgeous. Wow. However, we all know damn well she’s not going to want to climb into a sex sling. She might, however, prefer to be tied to a bondage bed or the St. Andrew’s Cross. Perhaps a simple sex chair to make her more comfortable?
You see my point.
Create a Sex Furniture Collection
You can think of a sex sling as a piece of furniture or a toy that you can hang up in just a few seconds. You move up to the furniture level if the sling has its own frame or it actually attaches to the posts of your bed. When you use a sling with a frame, you should figure out where you will keep it. No one can hide a sex sling in their house unless you have a few plants from the frame when you are not using it. Even then, it might be too big for your house.
A basic frame can be loosened using the top bolt, and you can fold both sides of the frame together for easy storage.
The vacuum bed is something that you climb into, you breathe out a small hole near the top of the mat, and the air is vacuumed out of the bed. The bed has two rubber or vinyl sheets that you lie in between, and you are trapped inside the bed when the air is removed. You can only breathe through the small hole that is provided, and your partner can tease you endlessly because you are not going anywhere. This is one of the simpler sex furniture pieces because you can slide it under your bed in a second or fold it up when you are done playing.
Bondage sheets or simple bed rigs typically hide under your mattress. This means that no one knows they are there in the first place. You can pull out the harnesses, straps, or rungs when you are ready to tie down your partner, and you have converted your bed into a bondage bed in seconds.
While bondage sheets or simple rigs are not very strong, they can restrain your partner for sex, punishment, and teasing. This is a good place to start when you want to tie up your partner. This might also be a good gift for your dominant partner if you know they want to tie you down. If you are not the super-kinky sort, these bondage sheets or rigs might be enough.
Cages are hot. Period. The end. I’ve been kept in one. It’s an AMAZING feeling, but it can be hard to keep in the house. You have five basic options.
• You keep the cage in the main living area, but you cover it with a sheet or blanket that sort of turns it into a buffet or serving table.
• You use a modern or artistic style of cage that does not actually seem to be a cage. It just looks like…art. No one will know, but your partner will know you mean business when you lock them inside after stripping them down, collaring them, and gagging them. (Anyone reading this article who hasn’t thought about this for at least half a second is lying to themselves.)
• You keep the cage in your bedroom and guests never go in your room.
• You keep the cage in the basement or a hidden room.
• You use a foldable cage that can be stored under your bed when you are not using it.
Bondage beds take all this furniture to the next level. They are designed with bedposts and hooks you can easily tie your partner to. You can even get a bondage bed that has a cage underneath. That alone is really sexy. You can put your partner under the bed tied up for the night, and you literally sleep on top of them.
You can add a range of eyebolts and hooks to a bondage bed, and they can be covered with a simple canopy or your sheets. The bed looks majestic, and your guests never know what you do with it.
Could you convert your current bed into a bondage bed? You could, but buying a specialty piece is much safer and simpler to use.
The St. Andrew’s Cross
St. Andrew’s Cross is a unique item that some people call an “X cross” because it looks like an X. In case you didn’t know, St. Andrew was crucified on one of these instead of a regular cross. However, it’s a functional way to tie up a submissive. However, it is typically the most obvious piece of sex furniture you can own. Yes, you can tie your slave to it and have the best sex of your life. You can punish them. You can display them, but you need to keep the cross on or near a wall.
You have two basic options:
• Keep the cross in a private room where it has a back leg that provides support.
• Have the cross attached to the wall in your bedroom or living room and design around it. If you are very clever, you can make it look unique without drawing attention to the fact that your partner was getting whipped on it 8 hours before the neighbors came over for breakfast.
Some couples have a simple sex bench that they can lie on have the best sex of their lives. Your partner can get on all fours over a smaller bench, and you can tie them to it easily. If you take the next step up, it will look like something of a workbench with padding. You can bend your partner over the bench for sex, or you can tie them to bench for punishment.
However, the bench is easy to hide because you can lay clothes over it like it is a dressing station.
The Sex Couch
The sex couch is a soft and simple device that you can use when you need to get in just the right position for sex. For the most part, these furniture pieces or swooping chaises that you can lie on comfortably for hours at a time. You could take a nap on the sex couch. However, when it is time to play, the bottom can get in position with straining. The top can easily take their partner without working too hard, and both of you will get off without feeling worn out.
As you get older, the sex couch could revolutionize your sex life—or you might want one because you want to grab her hips without holding her up off the mattress.
From Personal Experience, I Would…
Buy everything! (No seriously. They’re all great furniture pieces.) I’ve been on all of these things at least once, and I can assure you that a sex couch COMFORTABLE beyond words. I’m not saying you’re not into the sex if your partner is fucking you, but you can truly relax and let them take over.
Benches make spankings much more intense, or they allow you to aggressively take your partner from behind. A bondage bed is functional and intimidating (which is sexy if you, as a submissive, want to be intimidated.) The St. Andrew’s Cross makes you feel like you’re in a real dungeon, and sex slings give your partner all the control. I especially like the sex sling because you can be dominated in it for a long time before you have sex. While sex on the St. Andrew’s Cross is possible, it’s not nearly as easy.
The vacuum bed is a good way to feel trapped (and a good substitute for a weighted blanket if you want to feel trapped or held down.) Cages make you safe because your partner has all the control (and they put in the “I’m trapped in this dungeon” frame of mind.)
Lastly, a simple bondage sheet or under-the-mattress rig is perfect for couples who want to play around with BDSM without getting too serious. Also, it’s very difficult to get hurt using a bondage sheet set. When you know what you are doing, you can step up to more serious sex furniture.
Sex furniture is a must in any healthy adult relationship. If you are hosting new partners, you might want sex furniture that will make it easier for you to have fun and get off as fast as possible. You and your partner might have a favorite piece of sex furniture, or you might take a look at a piece of sex furniture and realize that is just what you need. If you want to be even more advanced, you can add bondage furniture to the mix. Trust me, you can have sex on bondage furniture. Just align your kinks with the furniture you buy and find a place to hide when guests show up.